Welcome to another episode of Inspiring Women, the podcast that celebrates the stories of extraordinary women from all walks of life. I am your host, Betty Collins. Join us for an inspiring conversation that will leave you ready to take on the world. So stress, not if, but when. Sound familiar to you? Does that sound like a phrase you don't want to hear? Today I'm going to talk a little bit about stress and what we put ourselves through. Because stress, stress, at this point, I think we find people who are like, oh, I just don't want to be having any stress. I'm just going to go on vacation for. And then my stress will be gone.
Something went wrong!
Hang in there while we get back on track
Stress
Inspiring Women with Betty Collins
Stress
BC
Speaker
Betty Collins
00:00 Managing Stress During CPA Peak Season 04:53 Empowered by Modern Female Role Models 07:40 Managing Difficult Client Encounters 10:05 Efficient Email Management Strategies 13:27 Regular Reflection and Reevaluation 19:23 Perfectionism Causes Self-Induced Stress 20:49 Perfect Yet Stressful Celebration 25:20 Perfectionism's Costly Consequences 28:45 Regularly Reflect and Adjust Commitments 30:11…
✨ Magic Chat
Don't have time for the full episode?
Ask anything about this conversation — get answers in seconds, sourced from the transcript.
Try asking
Featured moments
Highlights
“So stress is not a matter of if, it's a matter of when. And most people really relate to it in the terms of, yeah, that phrase makes sense to me.”
“The Sandwich Generation Struggle: "Right now we have kids at home that should be on their own and parents at home. And then you are the middle one because you're the daughter of the parents, right? And you are the mother of the kids and the grandkids and they call it sandwich housing.”
“I have so many role models in my life, and I live, you know, in a time we all do 2025, where there's a lot of good women who have been successful and they're helping other women be successful.”
“sometimes when you're doing small little breaks of things, take the 10 easiest emails to get off your list.”
“Are Your Priorities Reflected in Your Calendar?: "Your priorities are what you're spending your time on. So if those don't match each other, you probably have an issue with over commitment.”
Timeline
How it unfolded
Read along
Full transcript
Vacation's two weeks out of the year, okay? There's 52 weeks in the year. So you got to figure out in those 50 weeks, you know, because in my life, for instance, it's really important what I do as a CPA from February 1 to April 15, right? It's a huge time. It's a huge time that CPAs are known for because of tax and year end and banking needs and all the things that we do. So we have always been a focus on that time period. But in order to get through 60 hour weeks, tons of work that you cannot even comprehend getting done because it all comes at once and you're tired and it's winter in Ohio and gray, you're just getting through that 12 week period. And unfortunately, we don't talk about then what are we doing from May 1 to December 1, because we need to talk about when we don't have the stress maybe, or when we're smoothly sailing, what do we do with that time so that when the boat starts rocking, we can get through it. So stress is not a matter of if, it's a matter of when. And most people really relate to it in the terms of, yeah, that phrase makes sense to me.
But here's some good humor one liners that I liked when I of course used my AI technology, right? I tried yoga to relieve stress. Now I'm stressed and I'm stuck in a pretzel. That sound familiar? Here's one that women can relate to. I have 99 problems and 86 of them are completely made up in my head. Okay, here's some good ones. I'm not stressed. I'm just, you know, aggressively overthinking everything. Or how about this one? Stress is when you wake up screaming and realize you haven't fallen asleep yet, right? And last but not least, and I love this one, I don't need a stress ball.
I need a stress Bat. Okay, so how do we deal with stress? How do we deal with it? Because remember, it's not if, it's when. So core stressors, these are things that in order to know stress and deal with stress and head on with stress, you got to know what, what causes it, right. What triggers it, what are those things that come to you? And for women, these are kind of the top ones. First of all, caregiving. Right now we have kids at home that should be on their own and parents at home. And then you are the middle one because you're the daughter of the parents, right? And you are the mother of the kids and the grandkids and they call it sandwich housing. But there is a lot of care today and stuff that has to be taken care of.
And it's generational sometimes that care, it's a big one for women. Secondly, guilt and burnout, the pressure to do it all be all can lead to a lot of stress and emotional exhaustion. And women are very guilty. I think we all are. We live in those worlds. There are people who I love watching the Facebook reels where they're minimalists living in the woods, literally building a tent out of tree branches in the cold winter, lighting fire and thinking I'm now in the woods with no stress. Look what it took to get through the woods. And look what it took right for building it.
So we tend to get burnout because we might burn out just to get stress free. Right. It's kind of crazy self doubt when we. Despite qualifications and our achievement, many women feel they don't deserve their success, which is just ludicrous. Or they don't even see themselves as successful. And so they're comparing themselves to other. Comparison is a huge stressor. It's a huge trigger.
Then you have the fear of anxiety, of course, high expectations, perfectionism, fear of that failure, isolation. A lot of times, you know, in my industry back in the 80s and even 90s, I was one of the few women in accounting. Now it's over 50, 60% of women are accountants, but only 21% of them are in leadership. So we still tend to feel isolated. When I used to go to retreat, I was one of the few women around the table for Brady Wear. Not a bad thing. Great group of men. But I didn't have, you know, that role model.
I was kind of over here, maybe to the side. They were always gracious to me, don't get me wrong. But I would have loved to have had a really strong woman that could just say hey, hey, hey, stop. Or you're doing fine or whatever it was, I might have relieved a lot of stress in my life. Or those core things that get you stressed. And then, you know, there are limited role models, but not so much today. I have so many role models in my life, and I live, you know, in a time we all do 2025, where there's a lot of good women who have been successful and they're helping other women be successful. So I don't have the same excuse to be stressed out because I'm isolated or I don't have mentors.
They're everywhere. And if you ask and you're looking for it, you'll find it. And when we don't manage stress, there's a lot of effects, certainly health anxiety, depressions, you know, mood swings. All of a sudden you're melting down. That would be my life. You have some, maybe some concentration issues. You can't focus on what's important. Burnout, for sure.
Headaches and migraines, sleep. I mean, look what people take for sleep today. And a lot of that. And then you have heart issues or whatever. The stress is something that puts you in the grave a lot earlier if you don't address it and figure out not how to be stress free, but how do you navigate through it? So you have to, in order to deal with stress, you got to get to what are those stressors? And then realize these things are maybe really taken me down. Right. What do I do with it? So what I want to talk about is. And I loved a person in my life long time ago.
I went to a class in the 1990s, okay. And I went to this class and this woman, Rebecca Lee, she was a great speaker, and she just taught on general accounting things, you know, at very. I mean, I was a staff person to senior, maybe, maybe manager in those timeframes. And I always would go back to her classes. We didn't do them virtual. We didn't do them online. It was, you went to a hotel and you spent the day with a bunch of accountants. But she really taught me something about when I went into management, and she said, you got to prepare for the chaos, which causes the stress.
Just plan for it. You got to plan for it. You got to be realizing it's, you know, February 1st to April 15th. You can't plan enough in those ways to not have stress. But you can plan to navigate through the stress. So sometimes in order to do that, I think you have to visualize success. Okay. I look at my calendar two weeks out, and there are times I go, holy moly, how am I going to get through these weeks? So I visualize, what would I like that week to look like? Well, you know what, I don't need to go to bank to lunch with one more banker.
I'm just going to take that off my list and say, you know what? It's not a good time for me to do this. I have a client that's really, really not easy and I just as soon avoid them. But they're on my calendar. So I got to picture a success. How am I going to get through that meeting? And most of the time for me, when it's hard people to deal with, this is what I think through. I'm going to first figure out what is the wind in the sail that I'm going to take. Because when you take someone's wind out of their sail, the stress levels come down tremendously. So I'm going to go in and I'm going to be pretty good.
I'm just going to go in from the get go and I'm going to be ready again. Planning for the stress. Because it's not if, when. And then there is that whole thing as you prepare yourself more and you visualize more, you're preparing. It's kind of like you've built some mental muscle. Okay? And there's nothing like mental muscle, which I allude that to confidence. And then you get through it, it's over. The crucial conversation's done, everything's on the table.
Now what? And then you'll probably relieve yourself of a lot of stress by doing that. So visualize what you want that to look like next week and the week after and the month and your year. However, visualize the success that's preparing for stress. The other thing you do is you got to have some positive self talk. Please don't shut me off at this point because you're not a rah rah person. But this is temporary. You push through, you're in the mirror, you're looking at it going, I can do this, I can do this, I can do this. I mean, I'm kind of talking about that, but my husband always tells me this is a hill you can climb.
There probably isn't a hill you can't climb. You just got to figure out the hill. He says that to me a lot. So you got to have those positive pumping up. He's my biggest fan. He's always giving me the what for. But it's very helpful in your planning for stress because remember, it's not if it's when. So plan ahead.
How do you do that? Sometimes you break really big tasks into a bunch of small ones. Email. Email makes me crazy. And I probably respond to 100 a day. If I respond to them at 10 at a time and then go focus and I work for 50 minutes and take 10 minutes at the rest, the end of the hour to go through emails and you'd get rid of the ones that are most current, the one that are causing you stress, the ones who screaming the loudest. Right. But you deal in email in sections instead of I got to clear this right now, I just got a notification. No you don't.
And people will wait for you. Not two weeks, but they'll wait. And so dealing with things in small sections sometimes is better than I've got a hundred emails, blah blah blah. And I bet you 40 of them I didn't have to respond to in five minutes. And probably though in those 40 they're two liners, right? So sometimes when you're doing small little breaks of things, take the 10 easiest emails to get off your list. Right. And when I go on vacation, one of the things I always do is I just want one screen only of emails left. And usually they are I gotta meet with somebody or they're not client related, but I try to get that screen to look, look, I've got six things.
Yay. You have to remove the chaos and the barriers. So I run a division in our company called CAS Client Advisory Services. And it never fails that we seem to always be in stress. We're in chaos. And part of it is because the meeting starting at 9:30 and by 10T10 we're finally having the right conversation in a room with no heat or a room that's way too hot because we didn't reserve a room and nobody and then people wanted to go get coffee and then there was total chaos and it just drives me crazy. So after the last time I said, this is it, I cannot do this. I said, you know what we're going to do? I don't want anyone coming late.
9:30 means 9:30 coffee. Bring it with you. If you can't wait an hour to go get another cup. Sorry. And I just kind of set some boundaries because it's up and down and then you get started, then you're on a time crunch and that kind of helped things. But I also took it to different levels and said, you know what, I want agendas because we're just in here. And then affirmation. Progress is better than perfection.
Put that in your mirror. Put that on your screensaver. Progress is better than perfection. At least I'm making progress. I'm heading in the right direction. We're gonna get there. It just might take some time. Overcoming perfectionism, overcoming commitment.
Recognize the signs. Identify your priorities. Go to your calendar and see what your and tell me your priorities. Here they are, the top three priorities in my life. Go to your calendar last week and did they reflect your time? Because your calendar is going to tell my 80% of my calendar. When I say, these are my priorities. What did I do? And you'll see it, because most of us have electronic calendars. You'll see it.
What did I spend my time doing? Was it my priorities? Because if it isn't, then they're not your priorities. Your priorities are what you're spending your time on. So if those don't match each other, you probably have an issue with over commitment. Review of your calendar is really good. What could have happened? What didn't happen? And then change your calendar in the future so that it can be, this is going to happen, not it didn't happen. And then always audit the commitments you've made. Is that really what I should be doing? Is that really the right thing I should be putting my time into? Because over commitment is not. It will cause you stress again.
Not if, when. So then reframe your thinking gracefully. Say, no, thank you. It's okay. Block time for you in permanent ink. And those are boundaries. And you know, once people know those are boundaries and. And you're not going to budge on it, they're not going to ask you again.
And then reflect regularly. Look back and go, okay, is this how I wanted my week to go? Is the next two weeks really how I want them to go? And why am I still doing this? And I've had times where I've gone through that, and I'll go, you know what? I'm committed to too many things, and this one is off the radar now because I just can't. And then you have those hard conversations with whoever it is or whatever it is, and you say in 10 minutes you can say, I'm not doing that anymore. And here's the reasons why you're done. Take off the routine weekly networking meeting that you're not getting any business from. Take off the things of I've got to meet a banker every morning for breakfast. Why? Or whatever it is. Reflect on it, look at it, and then do something about it sometimes.
Because when we're recognizing those. Those things of self talk, negative self Talk. You have to look at the voice in your head who's saying it's right. Who is that voice in your head? And are you looking at it like you should? What is the language that I'm using? So I. I've gone to a shrink off and on my whole life. I haven't been to one in a while. I'll have to admit, I must be doing okay. But she was only 27.
I think I was 40. And she was doing her intern kind of thing, and so we just connected. She was from Russia. I'm from central Ohio. She was younger. I wasn't. She wasn't married. I was.
And. And, man, did she impact my life. It was amazing. And the one thing she would say to me is, I would start rambling on. Well, he does this, and he said that, And. And then he thinks this. And she goes, okay, first of all, did he say that? Is this real or are these assumptions in your head? No one ever said that to me. I went, well, yeah.
She goes, is it real or is this assumptions? To this day, 20 years later, I still. When I get those conversations in my head going, I'm like, wait, am I making assumptions or is this real? And about half of your issues go away. Because a lot of times we're making an assumption, and we're building on the assumption, right? So you got to challenge the voice. You got to challenge the topic and the language and start identifying. Here I go, betty, you're going down this rabbit hole of he thinks. No, does he think that? Is that a real thought, or am I assuming that? And then you gotta really kind of reframe the self talk. You know, you have to sit and go, I always mess up. Or, no, you know, I'm learning.
I'm growing. I just got an MDA or an MBA in life, and I'm gonna take this experience and I'm gonna build on it. And so the negative talk can become positive. You also can be very delusional by going, oh, that's not real. Oh, that doesn't matter. Right? So it's not a matter of if, and it's not a matter when it comes to stress. It's a matter of when. And one of the things that I loved in the Julia Roberts movie, she's in Rome.
Her whole goal is to eat and have an appetite again. Wouldn't that be awesome? To go, like, four months and eat Italian food? That's real and amazing. So she's there, and. But she realizes she's. So she's in the middle of the Roman Colosseum, you know, and back in the day, that was the place, that was the social point of Rome. And now it's ruins. Okay. Now it's really for the homeless.
It's for animals that hide there. It's for. But people still take tours and they go through it to see it, to get some kind of glimpse of it. And what she realized as she was sitting in things that are just in ruins. Ruins are the road to restoration. Because the only thing that happens now at the Coliseum is that it could be transformed. It's already at its lowest point. It's already back here.
It's had all the stresses of life on it and it shows. So the only thing you can choose to do is sit there and enjoy the ruins and reflect or you can transform the Coliseum. And she talks about that. She goes, I guess and she goes, you know, and transformation is a continual process. And so when I look at everything, when it comes to stress and I look at not if, but when and when I look at the things that I could be avoiding dealing with. Stress is a continual transformation of how you think and, and identifying things and how you can navigate through it differently. And so that, so you have a choice. You can choose to go, I'm going to deal with my stress, I'm going to hide from my stress.
I'm going to ignore stress, I'm going to pretend it's not there. I'm going to just wait till I melt down and have a heart attack. Or you can choose to navigate through it and transform how you deal with it, or you can just keep doing the same thing you've always done. And when you do that, you'll have the same results. So stress today is one of those things you're not going to get away from. And we live in a culture that is becoming, it seems like ever, ever ending in stress. It's not just turn off your social media, although that's a good idea. It really is a lot more than that.
So I would challenge you today, deal with your stress. It's not if, it's when. I'm Betty Collins. I'm so glad that you joined us today and I hope that you found this encouraging. And her point was she chose stress that was self induced. Cancer is not self induced. Right. Car wrecks that you didn't, you know, someone hit you and t boned you and you're going through a year of therapy.
That's not stress you caused, but self induced stress is the one that is really the most common and it's 80%. There's that 20% that unfortunately had a bad situation. But the number one as I searched was perfectionism. That is the biggest self induced stress we can put in our lives. Everything has to be perfect. My daughter is a classic example of perfection. She now has a one and a half year old and she's learned that the house is going to be a mess and not all the dishes are going to get done right away and laundry is going to stay stacked and you're going to be tired at night and you're not going to sleep from 11 to 7 every day like you used to. But she had a party for her little son.
He's a doll, Cooper, and he turned one last February. And she wanted to have the party, the perfect party. And she wanted her, you know, my husband and I there. She wanted her dad and her stepmom. She wanted his parents, grandparents, closest friends, you name it. So, and the long story short is we had 26 people in my house, fully decorated, the entire downstairs looking like the jungle with animals and flags and you name it, pictures everywhere. It took us in the entire day to decorate, do food and all of it. And you know, she said I didn't really enjoy it because it's kind of like a wedding, right? And so.
But she wanted everything perfect because this was. Cooper will never remember that, okay. What he loved and the best part of the whole day was the simplest thing. Give the kid a cake and let him just eat it. That was the highlight of the whole party. But she wanted this. Of course, she learned it from me because I've done those things all my life where everything has to be decorated, food has to be a certain way, and we had to have every, you know, you can't just have five people, you got to have 10. But she didn't enjoy her moment and she put herself through stress and put her husband through stress.
At the end of the day, they were thrilled. They did the party and everyone loved it. But she didn't enjoy the time other than other. The second thing that is the biggest, biggest self induced stress. You know, that life we create right over commitment. I'm guilty. You look at my calendar from the last four months, 80% of my calendar is full. That's ridiculous.
It really should be no more than 60% over. Commitment kills us all. I mean, you talk to parents today? Well, he's in this sport and she's in that sport. And he's doing this and she's doing dance and, and every night of the week is taken till 9 o'. Clock. So we just go through a drive through, everyone's exhausted. And then when that season's over, we go to the next season. Now we're playing football and then she's in volleyball and school is back in play and we over commit and we've taught our kids to over commit themselves.
And so we need to say saying yes to too many things or taking on more than you can manage at work and or home. And then you're guilty when you don't meet everyone's expectations. Then you feel bad and burned out when your boundaries just keep getting run over. So I don't know how you do it. I don't know how you get rid of over commitment. We live in a time where over commitment is the thing. I guess what I would tell you is learn from those you see that don't over commit. And they know how to set boundaries and know and there's not a lot of them.
There's. I would say there's two of those type of people to every 10. But they are there. And there are people who are very good at that. We're so afraid of missing the moment, missing the new client, missing the activity, missing the kids things miss, I'm not there. Oh my goodness. When in reality we're missing it because we're too tired to enjoy it. My son just went to Disney with his children.
You could be there for a month to get and see everything from every park. And what was so funny was his little son, six years old, Jude. He was my first grandson. And by Sunday at day four, he says to his dad, I'm just ready to go home. Can we go back to Yuriksville? That's where he lives. And they were like, well, we're at Disney. We're at Disney. And he's like, okay, I'm tired.
He's six years old right now. Silas was the second son. He could have gone 247 at Disney, but he's that kid, right? So. But even one night, the night before they were getting ready to leave, my daughter in law and her mom went to the parks to see the fireworks. And my son said that was the best night in the terms of I'm there with just the boys in our room. They're tired, they're laying there and we're just talking about the good times of the week, looking at pictures and laughing. And they were as content, if not more in that scenario. But we tend to over commit.
Disney is 24 7. It's craziness. And then the other thing of the number one self induced is this negative self talk. I'm just not good enough. I just can't do it. Oh, woe is me. And then you tend to get paralyzed or do nothing. So those are the three top the perfection, the over commitment and just negativity.
How do you overcome perfection? Well, you have to recognize the signs of perfection. You know, you have to recognize it. I mean there's a saying I love. We can't be perfect or we'll lose the good. Something of that nature or perfection takes over. What is good? Good is enough sometimes perfection is never probably there. So you have to constantly look at am I being perfectionist? And what is that trigger? How are the signs? And probably it's because you're constantly self criticizing yourself because you didn't do enough. It's the fear of failure, it's making mistakes.
And then you're going, okay, so recognize those signs. Why am I failing? Why am I fear? Why do I live in this? And probably there's probably related to perfectionism, procrastination due to high standards. So we tend to go, these are my standards. I can only do this. I had someone who brought in six years of tax returns because they didn't. They wanted their books and everything to be perfect for the tax returns. Meanwhile, they got six years. So we filed them all, we got them in and they missed out on thousands of dollars of refunds because of the statute of limitations, because they just couldn't get past.
And I'm talking $10 issues and $100 here and there. In the scope of things, they lost thousands of dollars for hundreds of dollars. That's perfection gone bad, right? So you have to look for that. And then procrastinating, it's now, now I'm in four years of not filing taxes. Now I'm in six years. And then all of a sudden you have this aha moment. I got to get this done, I've got to get it done now. And this is crazy.
And then you do it and you put yourself through something that could have been avoided. How else do you recognize sign? Probably you have difficulty delegating tasks. I mean I know somebody who's in a leadership position 24 7. She never stops because she's the only person that can do it and she has to sign off on it and she has to be a part of it. And then things just don't get done. There are things that just you never get to. So overcoming perfectionism, you got to recognize the signs and then you got to rethink how am I going to rethink? Replace. I must do this perfectly with, I'm doing my best.
You're going to get what you get. Understand the mistakes that are part of growth and don't reflect on your inequitacy, inaccuracy. Did I say that? And then affirmation. Progress is better than perfection. Put that in your mirror. Put that on your screensaver. Progress is better than perfection. At least I'm making progress.
I'm heading in the right direction. We're going to get there. It just might take some time. Overcoming perfectionism, overcoming commitment. Recognize the signs, identify your priorities and go to your calendar and see what your and tell me your priorities. Here they are, the top three priorities in my life. Go to your calendar last week and did they reflect your time? Because your calendar is going to tell my 80% of my calendar when I say these are my priorities. What did I do? And you'll see it.
Because most of us have electronic calendars. You'll see it. What did I spend my time doing? Was it my priorities? Because if it isn't, then they're not your priorities. Your priorities are what you're spending your time on. So if those don't match each other, you probably have an issue with over commitment. Review of your calendar is really good. What could have happened? What didn't happen? And then change your calendar in the future so that it can be, this is going to happen, not it didn't happen. And then always audit the commitments you've made.
Is that really what I should be doing? Is that really the right thing I should be putting my, my time into? Because over commitment is not. It will cause you stress again. Not if, when. So then reframe your thinking gracefully. Say, no, thank you, it's okay. Block time for you in permanent ink. And those are boundaries. And you know, once people know those are boundaries and you're not going to budge on it, they're not going to ask you again.
And then reflect regularly, look back and go, okay, is this how I wanted my week to go? Is the next two weeks really how I want them to go? And why am I still doing this? And I've had times where I've gone through that and I'll go, you know what? I'm committed to too many things, and this one is off the radar now because I just can't. And then you have those hard conversations with whoever it is or whatever it is, and you say in 10 minutes you can say, I'm not doing that anymore. And here's the reasons why you're done. Take off the routine weekly networking meeting that you're not getting any business from. Take off the things of I've got to meet a banker every morning for breakfast. Why? Or whatever it is. Reflect on it, look at it, and then do something about it sometimes. Because when we're recognizing those.
Those things of self talk, negative self talk, you have to look at the voice in your head who's saying it, right? Who is that voice in your head? And are you looking at it like you should? What is the language that I'm using? So I. I've gone to a shrink off and on my whole life. I haven't been to one in a while. I'll have to admit, I must be doing okay. But she was only 27. I think I was 40. And she was doing her intern kind of thing. And so we just connected.
She was from Russia. I'm from central Ohio. She was younger. I wasn't. She wasn't married. I was. And, man, did she impact my life. It was amazing.
And the one thing she would say to me is, I would start rambling on. Well, he does this, and he said that, and. And then he thinks this. And she goes, okay, first of all, did he say that? Is this real, or are these assumptions in your head? No one ever said that to me. I went, well, yeah. She goes, is it real, or is this assumptions? To this day, 20 years later, I still. When I get those conversations in my head going, I'm like, wait, am I making assumptions, or is this real? And about half of your issues go away. Because a lot of times we're making an assumption, and we're building on the assumption, right? So you got to challenge the voice.
You got to challenge the topic and the language and start identifying. Here I go, betty, you're going down this rabbit hole of he thinks. No, does he think that? Is that a real thought, or am I assuming that? And then you got to really kind of reframe the self talk. You know, you have to sit and go, I always mess up. Or, no, you know, I'm learning. I'm growing. I just got an MDA or an MBA in life, and I'm gonna. I'm gonna take this experience, and I'm gonna build on it.
And so the negative talk can become positive. You also can be very delusional by going, oh, that's not real. Oh, that doesn't matter. Right? So it's not a matter of if, and it's not a matter when it comes to stress. It's a matter of when. And one of the things that I loved in the Julia Roberts movie, she's in Rome. She's. Her whole goal is to eat and have an appetite again.
Wouldn't that be awesome? To go like four months and eat Italian food? That's real and amazing. So she's there and. But she realizes she's. So she's in the middle of the Roman Coliseum. And back in the day, that was the place that was the social point of Rome. And now it's ruins. Now it's really for the homeless. It's for animals that hide there.
But people still take tours and they go through it to see it, to get some kind of glimpse of it. And what she realized as she was sitting in things that are just in ruins. Ruins are the road to restoration. Because the only thing that happens now at the Colosseum is that it could be transformed. It's already at its lowest point. It's already back here. It's had all the stresses of life on it and it shows. So the only thing you can choose to do is sit there and enjoy the ruins and reflect, or you can transform the Coliseum.
And she talks about that. She goes, I guess. And she goes, you know, and transformation is a continual process. And so when I look at everything, when it comes to stress, and I look at. Not if, but when and when I look at the things that I could be avoiding. Dealing with stress is a continual transformation of how you think and identifying things and how you're going to navigate through it differently. And so that. So you have a choice.
You can choose to go. I'm going to deal with my stress. I'm going to hide from my stress. I'm going to ignore icstress. I'm going to pretend it's not there. I'm going to just wait till I melt down and have a heart attack. Or you can choose to navigate through it and transform how you deal with it, or you can just keep doing the same thing you've always done. And when you do that, you'll have the same results.
So stress today is one of those things you're not going to get away from. And we live in a culture that is becoming, it seems like ever, ever ending in stress. It's not just turn off your social media, although that's a good idea. It really is a lot more than that. So I would challenge you today, deal with your stress. It's not if, it's when. I'm Betty Collins and I'm sorry. Glad that you joined us today, and I hope that you found this encouraging.
Thank you for joining us on Inspiring Women with Betty Collins. We hope today's episode has inspired you to chase your dreams and break through your barriers and embrace your own unique journey.
Also generated
More from this recording
🔖 Titles
Navigating Stress: Strategies for Women to Thrive, Not Just Survive
Stress Is Not If, But When: How Women Can Build Resilience
Embracing Imperfection: Overcoming Stress, Perfectionism, and Overcommitment
Stress Survival Guide: Real-Life Tools for Women in Every Season
From Burnout to Balance: Managing Self-Induced Stress and Setting Boundaries
Breaking Free from Perfectionism and Overcommitment: A Path to Less Stress
The True Cost of Stress: Why Self-Care and Reflection Matter Most
Mastering Stress: Planning, Visualization, and Positive Self-Talk for Women
Women and Stress: Learning to Reflect, Set Boundaries, and Enjoy the Moment
Stress Happens: How Inspiring Women Prepare for Life’s Challenges and Find Peace
💬 Keywords
stress management, perfectionism, overcommitment, negative self-talk, women and stress, caregiving stress, burnout, work-life balance, boundaries, comparison, guilt, anxiety, isolation, role models, mental health, time management, emotional exhaustion, self-induced stress, progress over perfection, breaking big tasks, priorities, calendar review, delegation, mindset shift, self-reflection, overcoming commitment, positive self-talk, visualization, confidence building, effects of stress
💡 Speaker bios
Betty Collins is the host of the popular podcast “Inspiring Women,” where she celebrates the stories of extraordinary women from all walks of life. Passionate about motivating others, Betty crafts conversations that empower her listeners, delving into topics that resonate with real-world challenges—like stress and the pursuit of balance. With her warm approach and thoughtful insights, she encourages women everywhere to face life's hurdles with resilience and confidence. Through her storytelling, Betty Collins inspires her audience to tackle stress not as an obstacle, but as an inevitable part of success—and to emerge from each episode ready to take on the world.
ℹ️ Introduction
Welcome to another episode of Inspiring Women with Betty Collins, where we dive into real-life challenges and triumphs that shape the journeys of extraordinary women. In today’s episode, Betty tackles a universal topic: stress. From juggling careers and caregiving roles to battling perfectionism and the pressure to “do it all,” women face a unique set of stressors every day. Betty shares her own stories—like navigating 60-hour work weeks during tax season—and offers both humor and practical advice on how to manage the inevitable waves of stress. She highlights the importance of identifying your core stressors, setting boundaries, breaking down overwhelming tasks, and reframing negative self-talk. Ultimately, Betty encourages women to see stress not as something to avoid, but as an opportunity for personal growth and transformation. Whether you’re aiming for progress over perfection or learning to say “no,” this episode is packed with relatable insights, inspiration, and encouragement to help you face stress head-on—and come out stronger.
📚 Timestamped overview
00:00 Plan and balance work during less stressful periods to manage inevitable busy times effectively.
04:53 I used to lack strong female role models, causing stress. Now, in 2025, I'm surrounded by successful women mentors.
07:40 Avoiding a difficult client, managing stress, and aiming for successful interaction.
10:05 Tackle tasks in small sections; prioritize easy emails to manage volume.
13:27 Regular reflection helps prioritize and eliminate unnecessary commitments.
19:23 Perfectionism is a major cause of self-induced stress, often representing 80% of stress, with perfectionists struggling to accept imperfection in daily life.
20:49 Perfectionism led to stress at a child's party, overshadowing simple joys like cake.
25:20 Struggles with perfectionism and procrastination can lead to missed opportunities, as seen in the example of someone losing tax refunds due to delays in filing caused by their high standards.
28:45 Regularly reflect and reassess commitments, eliminate unproductive tasks, and have hard conversations to prioritize effectively.
30:11 Challenge assumptions; distinguish between reality and mental constructs.
33:58 Stress is unavoidable; manage it proactively.
📚 Timestamped overview
00:00 Managing Stress During CPA Peak Season
04:53 Empowered by Modern Female Role Models
07:40 Managing Difficult Client Encounters
10:05 Efficient Email Management Strategies
13:27 Regular Reflection and Reevaluation
19:23 Perfectionism Causes Self-Induced Stress
20:49 Perfect Yet Stressful Celebration
25:20 Perfectionism's Costly Consequences
28:45 Regularly Reflect and Adjust Commitments
30:11 Challenge Assumptions, Seek Reality
33:58 "Confronting Unavoidable Stress"
❓ Questions
Absolutely! Here are 10 discussion questions based on this episode of Inspiring Women with Betty Collins on stress:
Betty Collins mentions that stress is not a matter of "if," but "when." How does this mindset change the way we prepare for and manage stress in our lives?
According to Betty, caregiving, guilt and burnout, self-doubt, and overcommitment are some of the main stressors for women. Which of these do you relate to most, and why?
Betty talks about "visualizing success" as a strategy to navigate stressful periods. How might this technique look in your own daily life or work?
The episode highlights perfectionism as the number one self-induced stressor. In what ways has perfectionism created unnecessary stress for you or those you know?
Overcommitment is cited as a major cause of stress. How do you currently manage your commitments, and what changes could help you achieve a healthier balance?
Betty emphasizes the importance of positive self-talk. Can you share examples of how shifting your internal dialogue has impacted your stress levels?
Self-induced stress versus unavoidable stress is a key theme. What strategies can help distinguish between the two and address them appropriately?
Reflecting on priorities and reviewing your calendar were recommended as ways to reduce overcommitment. How often do you audit your schedule, and what have you learned from doing so?
Betty discusses the value of boundaries, such as blocking time for yourself in "permanent ink." What are some boundaries you can set to protect your well-being?
The concept of transformation in the face of stress, illustrated with the metaphor of ruins leading to restoration, is discussed. How can you embrace transformation during stressful times instead of resisting change?
These questions are designed to spark insightful personal reflection and meaningful group discussion about managing stress and embracing healthier habits.
❇️ Key topics and bullets
Absolutely! Here’s a comprehensive sequence of the topics covered in the episode “Stress” from the podcast Inspiring Women with Betty Collins, organized with primary topics and detailed sub-topics under each:
1. Introduction to Stress
The inevitability of stress: “not if, but when”
The myth of escaping stress through short-term solutions like vacations
Personal example: Tax season’s intense stress for CPAs
2. Humor as a Stress Reliever
Sharing witty one-liners about stress from AI technology
Relatable jokes and observations about overthinking and daily stressors
3. Core Stressors for Women
Caregiving demands: the “sandwich generation” scenario
Guilt and burnout from trying to "do it all"
Self-doubt and imposter syndrome
Comparison with others as a stress trigger
Fear, anxiety, and high expectations
Perfectionism and fear of failure
Isolation and lack of women role models (with changing trends)
4. Effects of Unmanaged Stress
Health implications: anxiety, depression, mood swings, burnout, physical symptoms (headaches, sleep issues, heart issues)
The importance of addressing—not eliminating—stress
5. Strategies for Navigating Stress
A. Identifying Your Triggers
Recognizing specific personal and professional stress inducers
B. Planning for Chaos
Story: Advice from Rebecca Lee about preparing for inevitable workplace chaos
Visualization of success as a planning tool
Example: Structuring schedules and anticipating tough meetings
C. Positive Self-Talk
The power and practicality of temporary, encouraging self-motivation
Example: Support from Betty’s husband as a motivational influence
D. Breaking Big Tasks Into Small Ones
Managing overwhelming duties (like emails) by segmenting tasks
Setting boundaries on work time and responding at deliberate intervals
E. Removing Barriers and Chaos
The importance of setting boundaries and clear expectations in meetings and work habits
Use of agendas and time management to reduce chaos
6. Addressing Perfectionism and Overcommitment
A. Overcoming Perfectionism
Recognizing the signs: self-criticism, procrastination, fear of mistakes, trouble delegating
Real-life anecdotes: Daughter’s birthday party, client with unfiled taxes due to perfectionism
The cost of “perfect” over “good enough”
B. Combating Overcommitment
Assessing priorities by auditing one’s calendar
Setting and maintaining boundaries (“no” as a graceful answer)
Examples: Overscheduling oneself and the impact on family and personal life
Importance of learning from others who set boundaries
C. Negative Self-Talk
Identifying and challenging internal narratives and assumptions
Advice from a therapist: separating assumptions from reality
Reframing negative thoughts to positive, growth-oriented ones
7. Personal and Family Stories to Illustrate Stress Triggers
Party planning and perfectionism (Betty’s daughter)
The exhaustion and overload of family trips (Disney trip with grandchildren)
8. Reflection and Continuous Transformation
Reflecting on past weeks and commitments for continual adjustment
The Julia Roberts “Eat Pray Love” Colosseum metaphor: ruins as a journey to restoration and transformation
The notion that dealing with stress is an ongoing, lifelong process
9. Conclusion and Call to Action
Stress as a reality—managing, not eliminating it
Encouragement to recognize, address, and transform how one deals with stress
Reinforcement: “It’s not if, it’s when”
This flow gives an organized view of how Betty Collins frames and tackles the topic of stress, offering personal anecdotes, practical tools, and broader reflections relevant specifically to women.
🎬 Reel script
Stress isn’t a matter of if, but when. On today’s Inspiring Women, I, Betty Collins, unpacked how core stressors—like perfectionism, overcommitment, and negative self-talk—can hold us back personally and professionally. The key? Learn to anticipate stress, set boundaries, reframe your mindset, and remember that progress matters more than perfection. You can’t avoid stress, but you can transform how you navigate it—and come out stronger. Let’s empower ourselves and each other to handle stress head-on and keep moving forward.
👩💻 LinkedIn post
Absolutely! Here’s a LinkedIn post inspired by the most recent episode of "Inspiring Women with Betty Collins."
💡 Just tuned in to the latest episode of Inspiring Women with Betty Collins—and wow, was it a timely deep dive into the realities of stress, especially in the lives of women juggling careers and caregiving roles.
One quote stuck with me: “Stress is not a matter of if, it’s a matter of when.” Betty unpacks how stress isn’t something we can always avoid—but we can get better at navigating it.
Here are 3 key takeaways:
Identify Your Core Stressors: Whether it’s caregiving, perfectionism, or overcommitment, recognizing what triggers your stress is the first essential step to managing it effectively.
Progress Over Perfection: Betty reminds us that striving for perfection often causes more harm than good; making progress—even if it isn’t perfect—is what really matters.
Set Boundaries & Prioritize: Audit your commitments, block time for yourself in permanent ink, and don’t be afraid to graciously say "no." Protecting your priorities is critical for your well-being.
If you’re feeling overwhelmed or burnt out, know you’re not alone. Stress is inevitable, but with self-awareness and thoughtful strategies, you can weather the storm and keep moving forward.
#WomenInLeadership #StressManagement #InspiringWomen #PodcastTakeaways #CareerAdvice
🗞️ Newsletter
Subject: How to Tackle Stress—Not If, But When | Inspiring Women with Betty Collins
Hello Inspiring Women Community,
We’re so glad you’re here! Our latest episode of Inspiring Women with Betty Collins dove deep into a topic that’s on everyone’s mind: stress. If you haven’t had a chance to listen yet—or you just want a quick recap—this newsletter is for you.
Stress: Not If, But When
As Betty shared, stress isn’t something we can avoid completely. It’s not a matter of “if,” but “when.” Whether it’s balancing careers, caregiving for loved ones, or just trying to be everything to everyone, we all face moments that test us.
But what can we do to better manage the inevitable? Betty’s wisdom is practical and relatable, and she offers several strategies that truly resonate.
Top Stressors for Women
Caregiving: Many women are caught in the “sandwich” generation, caring for both children and aging parents.
Guilt & Burnout: The pressure to do it all leads to emotional exhaustion.
Self-Doubt & Comparison: We often question our worth, even with significant achievements.
Perfectionism & Overcommitment: The drive to do everything, perfectly, creates self-induced stress.
Betty’s Tips to Navigate Stress
Visualize Success: Look ahead to your week and plan for those challenging moments. How do you want to feel when it’s over?
Positive Self-Talk: Even if you’re not a “rah rah” person, a little encouragement in the mirror goes a long way.
Break Tasks Into Smaller Steps: Tackle emails or big projects in chunks to avoid overwhelm.
Audit Your Commitments: Look at your calendar—does your time match your priorities?
Set Boundaries & Say No: Block off time for yourself in permanent ink and stick to it.
Challenge Negative Self-Talk: Are you dealing with facts, or just assumptions? Reframe your thinking with kindness.
Progress Over Perfection: Remember—moving forward, even imperfectly, is what matters.
A Thoughtful Reflection
Betty leaves us with a beautiful reminder from Julia Roberts’ character in Eat Pray Love: sometimes, ruins are just the road to restoration. Stress can break us down—but it’s also the starting point for growth, change, and transformation.
Challenge for the Week:
Reflect on your own sources of stress. Are they self-induced, rooted in perfectionism or overcommitment? Try just one of Betty’s strategies—say “no” to an unnecessary commitment, break up a big task, or change the conversation in your head.
You can listen to the full episode for more stories and advice wherever you get your podcasts.
Thank you for being part of our community of inspiring women!
With encouragement,
The Inspiring Women Team
—
P.S. Found this episode helpful? Forward this newsletter to a friend who might need it.
Let’s keep inspiring each other—one real conversation at a time.
🧵 Tweet thread
🧵 Let’s talk about STRESS. Not if, but when. Inspired by Betty Collins' latest "Inspiring Women" podcast, here’s a thread to help you rethink, manage, & transform your stress—because avoiding it is NOT an option ⤵️
1/ We all dream of a stress-free life (cue the two-week vacation fantasy). Reality check: there are 52 weeks in a year. What you do in the other 50 is what really counts!
2/ For women especially, stress pops up in caregiving, guilt & burnout, perfectionism, the pressure to “do it all”, and the classic culprit: overcommitment. Sound familiar? 🙋♀️
3/ Sometimes the funniest thoughts are true:
— “I tried yoga for stress... now I’m stuck in a pretzel.”
— “I have 99 problems and 86 of them are made up in my head.”
— “I don’t need a stress ball. I need a stress BAT.” 😅
4/ The killer? PERFECTIONISM. The pressure for things to be flawless causes more self-induced stress than anything else. Lesson: Don’t let “perfect” rob you of “good.”
5/ Overcommitment is a close second. Look at your calendar. Does it reflect YOUR priorities—or everyone else’s? If 80% is booked solid, no wonder you’re running on empty.
6/ Betty’s tips to break the cycle:
Visualize success: What would a smoother week look like?
Positive self-talk: “This is a hill I CAN climb.”
Break big tasks into tiny steps (especially those inbox mountains).
Audit your commitments ruthlessly. “No” is a full sentence.
Block time for YOU, in permanent ink.
7/ Don’t trust every thought. Sometimes the stress is ghost-written by your own assumptions. Ask yourself: Is this REAL or am I just assuming the worst?
8/ Progress > Perfection. Put it on your mirror, your phone, everywhere. Every small win is a stress-buster.
9/ Feeling burnt out? Even the simplest moments matter more than the “perfect” ones. Betty’s family found their best Disney night just chilling, laughing in the hotel room.
10/ Your ruins are your road to restoration. Like the Roman Coliseum, what feels broken can become the foundation for transformation. Stress isn’t a dead end—it’s the start of a new chapter.
💡 Bottom line: You can’t escape stress, but you CAN choose how to manage it. Don’t wait for meltdown mode—reflect, set boundaries, and transform the way you navigate chaos.
You got this! 💪✨ #stressmanagement #selfcare #womenempoweringwomen #progressnotperfection
🔁 RT if you needed this thread today.
🪡 Threads by Instagram
Stress isn't a matter of if, but when. Instead of wishing it away, let’s learn to navigate it. Progress over perfection and self-care over people-pleasing—these are the real game changers.
Most of our stress is self-induced: perfectionism, over-commitment, and negative self-talk. Recognize the signs, reframe your mindset, and give yourself grace. Good enough really is good enough.
Visualize success before a tough week. Break big tasks down, set boundaries, and audit your commitments. Your calendar should reflect your true priorities, not just your to-do list.
We often stress about assumptions, not reality. Challenge the voice in your head: is this real, or just a story? Half our stress dissolves when we stop believing every anxious thought.
Transformation through stress is possible—don’t avoid it, navigate it. Ruins are the road to restoration. Reflect, adapt, and choose to transform the way you respond to life’s pressures.
📓 Blog Post
Title: Navigating Stress: From Overwhelm to Empowerment
Subheader:
Insights from “Inspiring Women with Betty Collins” on Stress, Perfectionism, and Finding Strength in the Chaos
Understanding Stress: It’s Not If, But When
In the latest episode of Inspiring Women with Betty Collins, host Betty takes on a universal challenge—stress. The question isn’t whether we’ll face stress, but when and how we’ll respond when it arrives. Betty’s candid, relatable stories—drawn from her life as a CPA and her years of navigating high-pressure seasons—shine a light on the reality that stress is woven into the fabric of our lives. Yet, as she eloquently explains, we hold the power to reshape our relationship with stress for the better.
The Major Stressors: What Keeps Women Up at Night?
Betty identifies some of the top stress triggers for women:
Caregiving Responsibilities: Many women find themselves in the “sandwich generation,” caring for children at home, aging parents, or both—all while managing their own lives and careers.
Guilt and Burnout: The societal expectation to “do it all” can fuel emotional exhaustion and a pervasive sense of guilt.
Self-Doubt and Perfectionism: Despite achievements, women often struggle with feeling “not good enough” or measuring themselves against others.
Isolation: Even as more women step into leadership, feelings of isolation can persist, especially in male-dominated industries or new environments.
Overcommitment: The relentless pressure to say “yes” to every request and opportunity leads to packed calendars and diluted priorities.
These stressors don’t just weigh heavy on the mind; they manifest physically through headaches, burnout, and even serious health issues over time.
The Power of Preparation: Visualizing Success Amid the Chaos
A memorable lesson from Betty’s early career was to “prepare for the chaos.” Instead of striving to be stress-free, she argues for learning how to navigate stress gracefully. Visualizing what a successful (rather than perfect) week or project would look like helps create a mental roadmap. Sometimes, that means reprioritizing, delegating, or removing unnecessary commitments from your calendar. It’s about building “mental muscle”—or, as Betty puts it, developing confidence that you can weather whatever comes your way.
Tackling Perfectionism and Overcommitment
Betty dives deeply into two of the most common self-induced stressors: perfectionism and overcommitment.
Perfectionism often shows up as procrastination (waiting for conditions to be “just right”), self-criticism, and an inability to delegate. Betty shares examples—like her daughter’s over-the-top party planning—to highlight how the quest for perfection can rob us of joy and memories.
Overcommitment, on the other hand, is seen in overstuffed schedules and the feeling of being stretched too thin. Betty suggests reviewing your calendar regularly to ensure your time aligns with your true priorities. Setting and enforcing boundaries, such as blocking out “me time” or gracefully declining additional requests, is crucial.
The Role of Positive Self-Talk and Challenging Assumptions
One of the most powerful tools against stress is reframing the narrative in your head. Betty emphasizes the importance of positive self-talk—reminding yourself “this is a hill I can climb”—and being vigilant about assumptions. She shares a story of a therapist’s wisdom: when you find yourself spiraling with thoughts like “he thinks this about me,” pause to ask—did that person actually say that, or am I assuming? Often, half the issues that keep us anxious are based on unfounded assumptions, not reality.
Embracing Progress Over Perfection
Throughout the episode, Betty advocates for a mantra everyone could use: “Progress is better than perfection.” This simple affirmation encourages us to celebrate growth, not just flawless outcomes. Mistakes and setbacks aren’t proof of failure—they’re part of the learning process.
Choosing Transformation Over Stagnation
Drawing inspiration from the ruins of the Roman Colosseum, Betty reminds us that “ruins are the road to restoration.” Stress, adversity, and moments of feeling broken are not the end—rather, they are opportunities for transformation. Just as ancient ruins can be repurposed and appreciated anew, we too can transform how we think about and manage stress, choosing empowerment over overwhelm.
Final Thoughts:
Stress will always be a companion in life, but it doesn’t have to be an enemy. By recognizing our triggers, accepting imperfection, setting boundaries, and practicing positive self-talk, we can turn stress from a destructive force into a catalyst for growth. As Betty Collins concludes, it’s time to make the choice: will you let stress dictate your life, or will you rise to navigate and transform through it?
1000 word episode show notes
Inspiring Women with Betty Collins — Episode Overview: "Stress"
In this episode of Inspiring Women, host Betty Collins takes on a topic that resonates with just about everyone—stress. With her characteristic insight, wit, and empathy, Betty delves into the realities of stress, especially from the perspective of women who balance caregiving, careers, family expectations, and personal ambitions.
It's Not If, But When: The Inevitability of Stress
Betty opens by making a clear, memorable point: stress isn’t a matter of “if,” but “when.” Everyone deals with it, whether it’s from a demanding career, family care obligations, or even the pursuit of perfection. She humorously notes how people often think a vacation can wipe stress away—only to return to the remaining 50 weeks of the year when it lurks just beneath the surface.
Her own experience as a CPA during tax season means 60-hour workweeks, piles of obligations, and the added gloom of Ohio’s winters. But she presses the point that we need strategies not just for crisis mode, but for the “calmer” times, to strengthen our resilience before those inevitable waves hit.
The Humor in Stress
Lightening the mood, Betty shares a few AI-generated “good humor one-liners” about stress, from yoga-induced pretzel shapes to the classic, “I have 99 problems and 86 of them are completely made up in my head.” These one-liners provide a relatable laugh, acknowledging that sometimes, we exacerbate our own stress through overthinking and unrealistic expectations.
Core Stressors for Women
Betty outlines key stressors that tend to impact women especially hard:
Caregiving: The “sandwich” generation is often caring for both children and aging parents, sometimes even under the same roof.
Guilt and Burnout: The pressure to “do it all” can leave women feeling emotionally exhausted and guilty for any perceived shortcoming.
Self-Doubt: Despite their achievements, many women still feel undeserving or insecure, leading to unhealthy comparisons and heightened stress.
Fear, Anxiety, and Perfectionism: High standards, fear of failure, and isolation—especially for women in male-dominated fields—contribute further to the pile-up of stressors.
Isolation and Limited Role Models: Betty shares her personal story of being one of the few women in accounting in the ‘80s and ‘90s, and how the lack of mentors increased her sense of pressure.
The Effects of Unmanaged Stress
Unaddressed, stress can wreak havoc on all areas of life—health, focus, emotional stability, sleep, and even longevity. Betty underscores the importance of not striving for a “stress-free” life, but rather learning how to navigate the stress that inevitably comes.
Strategies for Managing and Transforming Stress
Betty’s advice is practical and achievable, echoing wisdom she learned from mentors like Rebecca Lee: prepare for chaos. You may not eliminate stress, but you can plan for it and bolster your “mental muscle.”
Key strategies she recommends include:
Visualize Success: Before facing an overwhelming week, picture what you want it to look like. Cancel unnecessary meetings, mentally rehearse difficult conversations, and focus on manageable wins.
Positive Self Talk: Even if it sounds like empty cheerleading, affirmations like “I can do this” can help reframe your mindset. Lean on supportive voices around you, and remember that self-pumping is a crucial part of stress preparation.
Break Big Tasks into Small Ones: Betty shares how handling emails in small batches, for instance, can make the mountain feel more like a series of hills. Taking “bite-size” actions builds confidence and reduces overwhelm.
Remove Chaos and Set Boundaries: Whether it’s making meetings more efficient or saying “no” to extraneous commitments, setting clear boundaries can prevent the kind of chaos that compounds stress.
Progress Over Perfection: She repeats the simple but powerful mantra: “Progress is better than perfection.” Aim for forward movement, not flawlessness.
Audit Your Calendar: Examine how your actual schedule aligns with your true priorities. If your calendar doesn’t reflect what matters most to you, adjust accordingly. Audit commitments regularly and graciously extricate yourself from those that don’t serve your goals or well-being.
Reframe Self Talk and Assumptions: Drawing from her counseling experiences, Betty advises listeners to challenge the negative assumptions running through their minds. Ask, “Is this thought real, or am I making it up?” Often, simply identifying and questioning these assumptions can dissolve half the stress they generate.
Self-Induced Stress: The Biggest Culprits
Betty identifies the top forms of self-induced stress:
Perfectionism: The desire for everything to be “just right”—from a child’s birthday party to a spotless house—leads to exhaustion and prevents enjoyment of the moment.
Overcommitment: When you try to do everything for everyone, life becomes a blur of obligations. She notes that “overcommitment kills us all,” recalling stories of parents overscheduling themselves and their kids, missing the joy in the rush to fit everything in.
Negative Self-Talk: Persistently telling yourself you’re not good enough or can’t do something is paralyzing, but also something within your power to change.
How to Overcome Perfection and Overcommitment
To break the cycle, Betty suggests:
Recognize the Signs: Catch yourself when you’re striving for perfection or saying “yes” too often.
Redefine Success: Replace “I must do this perfectly” with “I’m doing my best.”
Set Realistic Expectations: Accept that mistakes are part of growth.
Block Time for Yourself: Put personal time on your calendar in “permanent ink,” and don’t apologize for protecting it.
Reflect and Adjust: Regularly review your commitments and replace self-criticism with self-compassion and gratitude for progress.
Transformation Through Stress
Betty finishes with a metaphor inspired by the movie Eat Pray Love and the Roman Colosseum—once a vibrant center, now a ruin. Transformation, she notes, is a continual process. Stress can leave us feeling “ruined,” but ruins are also the starting point for restoration and transformation.
Final Thoughts
Betty encourages listeners to face stress, not run from it. While you can’t eliminate it, you can transform how you navigate it—choosing a path of progress, not perfection. In a culture where stress can feel relentless, she offers hope: with awareness, boundaries, and a culture of affirmation over criticism, women can live fuller, less stressful, and more inspired lives.
Thank you for joining Inspiring Women with Betty Collins. Let this episode be your permission slip to drop perfectionism, embrace your limits, and above all—show yourself grace.
10 takeaways from this episode
Absolutely! Here are 10 key takeaway concepts from this episode of "Inspiring Women with Betty Collins" on the topic of Stress:
Stress Isn’t Optional—It’s Inevitable: Stress isn’t a matter of “if,” but “when.” Everyone experiences it, so learning to anticipate and manage it is essential.
Identify Your Core Stressors: For many women, stress often comes from caregiving responsibilities, guilt, burnout, self-doubt, comparison, fear of failure, and a lack of role models or support.
Self-Induced Stress Is Common: Much of the stress we encounter—about 80%—is self-induced, stemming from perfectionism, overcommitment, and negative self-talk rather than external events.
Perfectionism Is a Major Stress Trigger: Striving for perfection not only causes unnecessary stress, but it also steals joy from otherwise meaningful moments. Progress is better than perfection.
Overcommitment Leads to Burnout: An overloaded calendar and saying “yes” to everything can leave you exhausted and less effective. It’s crucial to recognize your limits.
Boundaries Are Essential: Learn to set boundaries, say “no” gracefully, and block out time for yourself in order to reduce stress and prioritize what matters most.
Self-Talk Shapes Your Stress Response: Pay attention to the voice in your head. Challenge negative assumptions and reframe your internal dialogue in a more positive and realistic direction.
Preparation Alleviates Pressure: Anticipate high-stress periods and plan ahead as much as possible. Visualize what success looks like and break big tasks into manageable pieces.
Reflection Promotes Growth: Take time to regularly reflect on your commitments, routines, and the effectiveness of your stress management strategies. Adjust as needed.
Transformation Is Ongoing: Like ruins that can be restored, managing stress is a continual process of self-awareness, growth, and transformation. You can choose how you respond and adapt.
Betty’s message: Don’t aim to erase stress from your life—aim to navigate it wisely so that it doesn’t take control.
10 SEO keywords
Absolutely! Based on the transcript for the "Inspiring Women with Betty Collins" episode on stress, here are 10 refined one-word SEO keywords:
Stress
Perfectionism
Burnout
Overcommitment
Mindset
Boundaries
Self-talk
Resilience
Priorities
Transformation
These keywords capture the core themes and topics from the episode to help maximize search relevance.
Conversation Starters
Absolutely! Here are 8 conversation starters for your Facebook group to spark meaningful discussion about this episode of "Inspiring Women with Betty Collins" on stress:
Betty mentioned that "stress is not a matter of if, but when." How do you typically prepare yourself for stressful periods in your life or work? What routines or habits help you navigate challenging times?
The podcast highlighted perfectionism and overcommitment as two huge self-induced stressors for women. Have you noticed these tendencies in yourself? How do you manage (or hope to manage) them?
Betty talked about setting boundaries and saying ‘no’ gracefully as ways to combat overcommitment. What boundaries have you set recently? Was it hard? How did it go?
After a busy or stressful period, how do you review and reflect on where your time went? Do you have any tips for making sure your calendar matches your priorities?
Negative self-talk can be a big stress trigger. What are some ways you reframe negative thoughts into more positive or empowering ones?
Caregiving across generations was listed as a significant stressor for women today. If you're in the 'sandwich generation' or caring for others, how do you balance those responsibilities with caring for yourself?
Betty shared a story about a big, ‘perfect’ birthday party that ended up being more stressful than rewarding. Have you planned something with high expectations and found it hard to enjoy the moment? What did you learn from the experience?
The episode suggested visualizing success ahead of tough weeks or stressful events. Have you tried this? What are some ways you mentally prepare yourself for what’s ahead?
Feel free to take any of these conversation starters and add your own twist, or let us know other topics from the episode that resonated with you!
📖 Host Read Intro
Hey there, it’s Betty Collins. Today we’re getting real about stress—the kind you can’t escape, but maybe can outsmart! From perfectionism to overcommitting, I’ll share some laughs, lessons, and just a little hard-won wisdom to help you handle life when it gets overwhelming. Let’s dive in together!
LinkedIn Post for content creators
In the latest episode of Inspiring Women with Betty Collins, Betty dives deep into the realities of stress, emphasizing that it’s not a matter of if, but when. Through personal stories and insightful humor, she identifies the core stressors women often face, including perfectionism, overcommitment, and negative self-talk. Betty offers practical strategies for anticipating, managing, and navigating stress—turning stressful periods into opportunities for transformation.
3 Key Takeaways for Content Creators:
Progress Over Perfection: Don’t let the need for perfect content stall your creativity. As Betty says, perfectionism is the biggest self-induced stressor—focus on making steady progress instead of holding out for flawless results.
Set Boundaries & Priorities: Audit your commitments and calendar regularly. Avoid overextending yourself; identify what truly matters to your brand and audience, and protect your creative energy by scheduling “you-time” in permanent ink.
Challenge Negative Self-Talk: Content creation can stir up doubts and comparison. Replace assumptions and self-criticism with positive self-talk and reality checks—this empowers you to push through creative blocks and avoid creative burnout.
Let’s embrace the journey, transform our stress, and keep creating! 💡✨ #ContentCreation #InspiringWomen #StressManagement
ℹ️ Introduction
Welcome to another episode of Inspiring Women with Betty Collins. Today, I’m diving into a topic that touches all of us: stress. As women, we juggle countless demands—from our careers and caregiving roles to the pressure to be everything to everyone. I know firsthand what it’s like to navigate 60-hour work weeks during tax season, all while trying to keep everything else afloat. In this episode, I share some light-hearted moments, as well as practical strategies that have helped me manage the inevitable stress that comes my way.
I’ll talk about the importance of pinpointing your core stressors, setting healthy boundaries, and breaking big tasks into smaller, manageable pieces. We’ll also look at how reframing negative self-talk and choosing progress over perfection can make a world of difference. More than anything, I want to encourage you—stress isn’t something we can avoid, but it is something we can learn to navigate and even use as a catalyst for growth. Let’s tackle stress together, so we can show up as our best selves for ourselves and those we care about.
Made with Castmagic
Turn any recording into a page like this.
Upload audio or video — interviews, podcasts, sales calls, lectures. Get a transcript, summary, key takeaways, and social-ready clips in minutes.
Google
Apple
Or learn more about Castmagic first.
Magic Chat
Try asking