Creator Database [Robin Sharma] 6 Things I Wish I'd Learned At 20 Robin Sharma
Hi, it's Robin Sharma, author of the 05:00 a.m. club. And I am absolutely delighted that you've made the time to be here with me in this episode of the mastery Sessions. This episode is called six things I wish I'd learned when I was 20, and I'm going to get right into the first one. The first thing I wish I'd learned when I was 20 is that you can play with toxic people or you can live at world class. You can't do both. It's very easy for very good people to suffer from a lack of creativity and productivity because they're surrounded by energy vampires, dream stealers, and negative naysayers. And what I've learned over the years is simply this.
One of the most powerful ways that you can live a rare air life, whether it's in terms of your productivity or performance, or in terms of your prosperity or in terms of your happiness and sense of peace, is delete the people who steal your joy. I'll repeat that again because I believe it's so important for you. Delete the people who steal your joy. In the 05:00 a.m. club, there's a model that has been absolutely transformational to people across the planet, and it's called joy as a gps. There are three elements that will help you dramatically improve not only your success and your performance, but also your levels of inner joy. And one of those three things that I teach in the book is the people who steal your joy. In other words, you can do a list in your journal later today or right after this episode, write down in the first column on the left hand side of the page, who in my life is stealing Orlando diminishing my joy.
And then in the right hand column, write down, who are the people in my life who elevate my joy and then have the wisdom and bravery to start removing and releasing the people in your life who are bringing you down. And then I always get this message a lot or this question a lot. Well, what if it's my mother? What if it's my best friend? What? I'd simply say to you, people come into our lives for reasons, seasons or lifetimes. And one of the ways you can tell a victim in action is they give away their power to other people. You have a lot more power than you may be exercising an awareness, and you have the power to let go of people, even if it's a family member. Or you could say it's going to be selective association rather than talking to them every day. I'm going to speak with them once a week or see them once a month, or you can never see them again. You can see them less often.
It might be in between, but you have the power to do what feels right to you. The larger point is simply this. The first thing I wish I'd learned when I was 20 is you can be around energy vampires or you can change the world. You don't get to do both. The second thing I wish I'd learned when I was 20 is that everything that happens to you is for your growth. A bad day for the ego is a great day for the soul. So the ego might be saying, oh, that was terrible. That was a tragedy.
That was a difficult meeting. That was a hard moment. That's just your ego chattering. And your ego is really the voice of your fear. You want to become much more aware not of your ego, but of your higher self, that primal genius, that native hero that lurks at your core under the layers of fear, doubt, and disbelief. And the more you start to get to know your bravest, strongest, truest self. And the more you stand in your true power versus your fake power, the more you're going to realize everything that happens to you, whether it's been a tragedy, a subtle adversity, is for your growth. Therefore, it's all good.
You know, what I'd offer to you is simply this. Be a resentment collector. It's a term maybe you've never heard from me before. Be not a resentment collector. A lot of people, what they do is it's all about being positive. It's all about everything. Being in the sunshine, well, that's not really a true life. As a matter of fact, if you want to be a legendary leader, you've got to go through a lot of suffering.
You've got to be knocked down and then be willing to continue. You're going to be laughed at, and you're going to be ridiculed. You're going to face self doubt. You're going to be exhausted at times. You're going to face all sorts of challenges. If you want to get to your Mount Everest, and if you're listening to the ego, as well as the dominant messaging of our culture, which is everything needs to be happy and sunshine and puppies and roses and rainbows and butterflies, then you are going to miss one of the key insights I wish I learned at 20, which is everything that happens to you is good. Everything that happens to to you is for your growth. Everything that happens to you is designed to help you burn away your ego and build more fluency and intimacy with your authenticity.
What do I mean by that? I really think it's the times of suffering that make you great. We all, as we go through life, have our robben island seasons. And I'm encouraging you in this episode to develop an appreciation of not only adversity, but maybe even a love of tragedy. And you might say at that point, Robin, you've gone too far. And I would simply say, imagine how brave you will be if you are detached from all outcomes. Whether it's a tragedy, whether it's a victory, you still feel joyful, powerful, and peaceful. That is where the legends play. That is the place you want to get to detachment.
Literally, you let everything go. One of the things, I also wish that, and this is not one of the six, but I wish when I was 20, I'd learned the power of letting go, letting go of trivialities, letting go of, you know, things that are not really that big. But point number two is really this. You want to remember that everything that happens to you is for your growth. And if it's for your growth, and if the difficult things make you stronger, wiser, more relatable, more authentic, more loving, tougher, more creative, well, then that's good. Why would you resist it? Why not befriend it? The third thing I wish I'd learned when I was 20 years old, this is not going to surprise you. When you own your morning, you'll elevate your life. I wish when I was 20 years old, someone had taught me that early rising is an absolute game changer.
Why? Because if you learn how to start your days well, your days will unfold gloriously, consistently. When you start your days before sunrise, you have a gargantuan competitive advantage. There's no crowds. People are nicer. People are more open. There's no traffic on the streets. You can actually think one of the lines in the 05:00 a.m. club is tranquility is the new luxury.
When you start your day well, you have the time. I call it the victory hour. In the book, you. From 05:00 to 06:00 you get to run the 20 2020 formula, which I teach in the 05:00 a.m. club. So let me simply say, for now, you have the time to work on yourself. You have the time to work on your heart set, to develop your mindset, to exercise, whether it's doing planks or running on a treadmill, or maybe it's soulcycle, I don't know. But you get to work on your heart set.
You get the time early rising to work on your soul set where you can connect with your cause and connect with your mission and detect your values and build yourself into that hero and brave warrior so that when you go out in the world at 06:00 a.m. and you feel fundamentally different, you're full of true power, you're full of clarity on what you need to achieve during the day. You've got this intimacy with who you truly are. So you can stand steadfast in the turbulence that every day might bring. You have more energy, you have more joyfulness. You're connected with this peace. I mean, peace is really important to leadership and exponential productivity when you are peaceful, grounded, focused, versus diffused and scattered. There's a term called digital dementia.
A lot of us are suffering from digital dementia because of all the devices and technology. We're not focused and ground it. So of course we're not going to be at our creative and productive best. So the third thing I wish I'd learned when I was 20 years old is the the value of wiring in the lifetime habit of rising before the sun. I was in India on a book tour two months ago, and I learned. A lot of people came up to me and they said, robin, this is our philosophy. This is why the great sages and the great mystics and the great poets and the great thinkers got up before the sun. This is why Mahatma Gandhi got up before the sun.
It is a time of incredible peace in the air. There is a magic before sunrise. And what I was told in India on this book tour was that that's why people meditate at 05:00 a.m. because the mind has rested through the night, so it's more pure and available for new learning and growth. The heart is more open at 05:00 a.m. so you can do that deep heart set work to release the lower toxic emotions and to optimize your gratitude, joyfulness, inner majesty. And so I wish I knew that at 20. Now, I learned it towards my late twenties, so, you know, I didn't miss out on it mostly.
But I'll share one thing with you. Joining the 05:00 a.m. club and rising before sunrise and running the 20 2020 formula is absolutely transformational. Hi, it's Robin Sharma, and I really hope you're enjoying this episode of the mastery sessions. I'm absolutely delighted that people from across the planet are getting such great results from what I'm doing in the mastery sessions. Well, for a long time. We've received so many requests from advertisers to put their ads on the mastery sessions, and I have resisted doing so. And yet, what I wanted to do very quickly is offer you two resources that I absolutely know will create some marvelous shifts and elevations and results in your performance and in your personal life.
The first is my book, the 05:00 a.m. club. If you have not read it, you really need to know. It's one of the best selling books on the planet right now for a reason. It is transforming the lives of everyday heroes and people who want to make their ascent to world class. Definitely read the 05:00 a.m. club. You are going to find it a very special book for your rise to world class.
Secondly, for years, people have been asking me, Robin, we want you to be our mentor. Robyn, we want you to be our coach. We want to learn what you've taught to the billionaires and the NBA superstars and the other professional athletes and the film icons and the titans of industry really quickly. All you need to do if you're interested in me becoming your mentor, head over to the circleoflegends.com. dot thecircleoflegends.com. i've created a world class digital mentoring program where I will work with you each month to help you make your leap and your ascent to absolute world class. Okay, now back to the episode. And this brings me to the fourth thing I wish I learned when I was 20, which is there is a difference between being busy, being busy and genuine productivity.
Please don't confuse movement with getting real things done. As a matter of fact, the billionaires that I coach and the titans of industry that I advise, they all have one thing in common. They really don't work super hard. They are much more interested in quality work than busy work. We live in a world where a lot of people are running around, being busy, being busy. They're doing too many meetings. They're available for every phone call. They're always checking their technology.
They never get lost. They're always. They're masters of yes versus magicians of no. And so their lives become very complicated. And yet, the true superstars that I've worked with, they're much less interested in complexity and they're much more invested in simplicity. They do a few things in their professional life staggeringly well. They build a great team, they structure a great lifestyle. So they have time to mountain bike, and they have time to be with their family, and they have time to read and they have time to go to museums and all of those other things that make you more creative and more productive in business.
So the fourth thing I've learned that I wish I'd learned when I was 20 years old is, please don't mistake being busy with being productive. My encouragement is be a purist versus a generalist. Fifth thing I wish I learned when I was 20 years old is this, that it doesn't matter what other people are doing. All that matters is who you're becoming and how far you've traveled. So I understand a lot of us haven't heard mentality. I understand that in this world of ours, especially with social media, we are suffering from an addiction to comparison. It makes me think of what Theodore Roosevelt once said. He said, comparison is the thief of joy.
I'll repeat that again because it's such a valuable idea, to me, at least. Teddy Roosevelt said, comparison is the thief of joy. And real leadership is not about. And real leadership is not about followership. It's about leadership. In other words, you can follow the crowd, do what everyone's doing, think the majority thinking, operate the way everyone is operating. Or you can run your own race, trust your instinct, be authentic, speak with your own voice, pursue your own ambitions, and be your own woman or man. But you can't do both.
And, yes, when you don't follow the crowd and when it doesn't matter to you what others are thinking and doing, you're going to be a freak. I'd simply offer you an insight. Hopefully, it'll put a smile on your face, which is, everyone seems normal until you get to know them. And so, yes, the outside might call you a freak or weird or eccentric, but what's more powerful than being true to yourself? Shakespeare said it really well. He said, to thine own self be true. And as I suggested, I wish I'd known when I was 20 years old. Forget about what other people are doing and how they're thinking, forget about how they're living. You know, the majority of people are full of exhaustion, and the majority of people are addicted to distraction, and many people are depleted and disappointed, and many people have resigned themselves to average.
So why would you follow what most people are doing? As a matter of fact, I think a great formula for world class is look at what most people are doing and go in the opposite direction. And all that really matters is, who are you becoming and how far you've traveled as human beings. It's really easy to beat ourselves up because we're not at our mountaintop. Well, that's the journey and process of world class. It's a lifetime pursuit. And you want to make the time to celebrate how far you've come in terms of your personal growth, in terms of your craft, in terms of your impact on other people and in person and in terms of the lifestyle that you've created. And the 6th and final thing I wish I learned when I was 20 years old is that the most loving person in the room wins. So one of the dominant beliefs in our society is that to be brave and courageous and successful you've in many ways, you need to work relentlessly, you need to push aggressively, you need to thump your chest, you need to express bravado.
And that if you are loving civilization, punctual, polite, sincere, caring, you're a weakling. And what I want to share with you, having worked with many of the most successful people on the planet and many of the great enterprises, whether it's General Electric or Starbucks or Microsoft or IBM, young presidents Organization, IBM, Watson, it just goes on. Nike. I want to offer you this. The best of the best understand that when you take care of the relationship, the money takes care of itself. The best of the best understands that the business of business is truly connecting with other human beings. And so the most loving person, and I really wish I knew this at 20, being loving and being open and caring about other people and being absolutely obsessed about helpfulness to other people by delivering extreme amounts of value to them is not only the right thing to do, it not only uplifts your joy, it not only grows your self confidence and makes you feel good when your head hits the pillow every night. It's an amazing business strategy because then you develop these evangelists for your brand and these fanatical followers for your products.
Because few things are as powerful as being in the presence of someone who genuinely cares. Especially right now, being in the presence of someone who genuinely cares. So there's a city I visit, and when I visit there's this food court. And in the food court there's this place that does this incredible mediterranean chicken. And I just love the food. When I go to this city and when I go to this food court, it's healthy and it's absolutely delicious. The only thing is this, when the boss is there, he hardly gives you any chicken. And when the boss is there, you hardly get any salad.
And when the boss is there, you hardly get any, any hummus. What's my point? He's not coming from being the most loving person in the room. The most generous person in the room. I think he's coming from a place of scarcity. No judgment whatsoever. I'm not in a position to judge anyone. I'm just reporting. I think he's coming from scarcity.
And yet, if he was coming from generosity and love and caring and just felt like I was told, people feel at hotels and in taxicabs in India that the guest is God. That's what they say in India. I learned that in talking to a taxi driver in India and also in a number of hotels in India, one in New Delhi. On the recent February trip, someone who was helping me out said, I said, where are you getting all this from, this joy you care so much? He said, well, we believe guests are gods. And so if this person at the mediterranean restaurant was more loving and more generous, and remember that the customer has a lot of choice where they can go. And when you are generous, people keep on coming back, I think he'd be even more successful. So thank you for being here with me in this mastery session. I hope it's been helpful.
If you want to go a lot deeper in my philosophy, as well as my methodologies on advanced creativity, exponential performance, genuine leadership, and if you really want to live a life that is world class, not only being successful but also soulful, then I really encourage you to read my book, the 05:00 a.m. club. It's currently one of the best selling books on the planet. Right now, at the end of the book, you also get a 66 day digital mentoring program. Details are at the end of the book, and the book is just transforming people across the planet. So why wouldn't you invest in it? I'd also love to share with you when you invest in your copy. A portion of my royalties goes to help children suffering from leprosy. So you not only get your transformation and learn how the best in the world begin their days and live their days, you're also helping a child who is in real need so you can feel good about that.
And if you'd like to go even deeper and want me to be your mentor because the the great athletes all have coaches for a reason, you really can't do it alone. It'll cost you a lot more to try to figure out how the best in the world build great companies, or how the great performers do it, or how the most successful people think, feel, operate, and live, you could spend a lifetime trying to figure it out. So if you'd like me to mentor you and help you accelerate your success and help you handcraft a world class life and help you, your primal genius and your native heroism. If that is of interest to you, then I'd love to help you do it. Head over to the circleoflegends.com thecircleoflegends.com that is my world class online monthly mentoring program, and you'll have a look at all the details over there. And finally, I really hope this episode has been valuable to you. If it has been valuable, I would love for you to share it with three friends within the next 24 hours. The teacher learns the most.
So by sharing this episode with three friends and talking about what you've learned, you're not only going to deepen and integrate the learning so it becomes more sticky for you, you're going to lift up your three friends so they rise with you. And wouldn't that be a brilliant thing? So I wish you all green lights and thanks so much for being with me. Hi, this is Robin Sharma. I hope you received great value from this master session. If you'd like to receive potent training videos, blog posts, learning tools, and information on my two live events, personal mastery Academy, and my flagship four day experience, the Titan Summit, go ahead and visit robinsharmer.com.